tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post3588237194752213268..comments2023-10-06T13:53:18.222+05:30Comments on Through the Corridors of Uncertainty......: Dollar Dreams from AndhraE Pradeephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00416470793598316855noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-71813190971957941272014-05-09T14:32:08.227+05:302014-05-09T14:32:08.227+05:30Hi! I came upon your article when I was searching ...Hi! I came upon your article when I was searching for exactly this topic. This obsession is too such a level that this has become a recurring feature even in Telugu movies!<br /><br />I am from Maharashtra and this obsession is common there as well. And it poses a great problem to people like me who are directly or indirectly told to stay outside India once we have gone to some country for higher education. It is really difficult for the parents and relatives to understand the loneliness that sets in after a few days into your course. I am still waiting for my parents to stop telling me that they will be glad to see me settled outside India, in spite of the fact that I would like to stay close to them.<br /><br />In spite of the readymade tea bags and canned milk, sometimes all you want to have is a cutting chai.<br /><br />I agree with the point of erosion of identity. When one is India, one is a part of a large family or group. When one is in the 'developed' countries, he/she is lost in the crowd. The supposed 'contact' that they may have with their family during the yearly December visits have no impact on the kids whatsoever. They are entirely American/British/Australian, and at best can be said to be of 'Indian origin'.<br /><br />All that people in India see when they imagine the life in countries outside are the clean roads, basic amenities and the fact that everybody has a car. What they don't see is a monotonous life of work on weekdays and cleaning on weekends and, the fact that it takes months of saving to buy the car, which in most cases is second hand.E Pradeephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00416470793598316855noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-49188318331041552412012-08-22T23:39:34.823+05:302012-08-22T23:39:34.823+05:30Thanks, Prabhu for dropping by...It is true that w...Thanks, Prabhu for dropping by...It is true that with both the set of spouses working, there may not be able to give enough time to their family, even when in India. But the proximity gives you that much more time to be together if you want - living in the same city but in separate houses and visiting parents a couple of times in the month is something that many couples do now. This advantage is not available when you travel so far away from them..E Pradeephttp://epradeep98.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-68909885999977917362012-08-22T05:52:37.790+05:302012-08-22T05:52:37.790+05:30As long as one is able to take care of their paren...As long as one is able to take care of their parents it should not matter. The social structure in India is fast changing. The present day educated girls would not like to be doing home making at inlaws place and rather choose to have her own family once she gets married. hence whether the new generation is back in India or in US it hardly makes any difference. Rather the distance and occassional visits by parents to US and children to India may improve love and affection for each other rather than constant tug of war between mother in law and daughter in law. <br /><br />The job nature really does not matter. It could be nice if one could afford good qualification in USA (this is expensive now) otherwise it is fine as long as the person does a job. Doing work in petrol bunk or shops is not in any crime and any job should be respected. Perguthprabhuhttp://www.pamnetwork.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-61632854755390184352010-10-18T17:34:20.242+05:302010-10-18T17:34:20.242+05:30This post is made in 2006. Now the dowry rates are...This post is made in 2006. Now the dowry rates are 5X. In top circles, crores are spent only on the wedding. Though there are thousands of engineering colleges rolling out lakhs of graduates each year, the demand far exceeds the supply. so our engineers really dont need to do jobs. They can invest or deposit dowry somewhere and sit idle in their offices poking fun at other less fortunate folks and 'managing' things.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-37738736916696811222009-03-13T20:24:00.000+05:302009-03-13T20:24:00.000+05:30The Kerala example is interesting since you mentio...The Kerala example is interesting since you mention that Mallus in the Gulf are lesser qualified than Gults in the US . All Mallus in the gulf know that they can never permanently stay in the Gulf and will have to return . This is in contrast with the highly educated Gults who find it easier to secure permanent residency. <BR/> I do get a feeling that money is fast losing its worth in Kerala . There is not enough resources in this state for the splurging Gulfees .Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11156235395208126241noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-81249395045218468702008-09-29T15:33:00.000+05:302008-09-29T15:33:00.000+05:30Really a nice article ...my views are 90 % matchin...Really a nice article ...my views are 90 % matching with urs.. but my post is still in my draft ..Krishnahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12679047647982949029noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-19826066091549703972008-08-07T11:05:00.000+05:302008-08-07T11:05:00.000+05:30Pradeep,Excellent article......Mirror of the facts...Pradeep,<BR/><BR/>Excellent article......Mirror of the facts. This is applicable domestically too. Its all a matter of money, status and society perception. <BR/><BR/>Inspite of this, there is a huge vaccum within all such individuals...a feeling of weariness of being constantly in this hollow race.Namithahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15148178217742673191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-38011986380799656712007-10-04T20:32:00.000+05:302007-10-04T20:32:00.000+05:30Great post on aging NRIs and parents...Great post on aging NRIs and parents...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-2515037991825265862007-01-16T01:34:00.000+05:302007-01-16T01:34:00.000+05:30Excellent post pal.Excellent post pal.Pradeep Chellappanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03618786309009673364noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-55131815911961059642007-01-15T15:14:00.000+05:302007-01-15T15:14:00.000+05:30Perception is not always reality.Perception is not always reality.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-56987920486674601512007-01-08T18:17:00.000+05:302007-01-08T18:17:00.000+05:30@Roopesh: You are probably right in calling it an ...@Roopesh: You are probably right in calling it an all-India phenomena but I would like to write about what I have witnessed first hand.<br /><br />@Shashi: While we all move to cities or outside India in search of better jobs, I have always felt this one track obsession of the people around me to go to US - the land of dreams. As mentioned by me, this is not the same as the Middle East travel by Keralites. I agree we require better career counselling to understand that there's more to life than "medicine" and "engineering" but I do not buy the point of my opinion being biased because of my engineering background.. I look at myself as a banker now and I have met many other people since then and I continue to think that this place has a mad rush towards being the enginner/doctor types.<br /><br />@Kurur: The identity crisis is really the biggest issue, I guess. After sometime, you are neither here nor there. One reason I would not like to leave my country and go outside.<br /><br />@Kishore: I guess you are right, sometimes, the farther you are, the closer you try to get to your roots. Could be a sense of guilt or maybe an attempt to retain one's perceived sense of identity, when abroad. But hey, don't be so desperate, I always liek to dream of a brighter future.E Pradeephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00416470793598316855noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-48114664504486365082007-01-08T02:25:00.000+05:302007-01-08T02:25:00.000+05:30Hi Pradeep.,
I fully agree with your perspectives...Hi Pradeep.,<br /><br />I fully agree with your perspectives. I am one of those 'late' victims of the dollar dream (in the sense that I moved to Europe in early 30's). I experience the parents trauma (my parents never wanted me leave them in the first place)<br /><br />One thing that I never regret about leaving India - is about culture and roots. Today India is at cultural cross roads. Family values and traditions are eroding must faster than the polar ice caps. There is little respect for the elders. It is for the fact I know, how many IT and neo-rich youngsters are taking care of their elderly parents. At least the people living in the west worry about their parents out of guilt or otherwise and send dollars or funds - but the new wave in India is least bothered about them. I never bothered about my roots and culture while in India but now, we really work hard to preserve the same. <br /><br />The bottom line is as parents, irrespective of where your son(s) live, future is bleak!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-48149365788429608282007-01-03T05:10:00.000+05:302007-01-03T05:10:00.000+05:30Pradeep,
The "loss of identity" that you spoke ab...Pradeep,<br /><br />The "loss of identity" that you spoke about was so much in view when I spoke to the owners of a mallu store here in Austin. The couple who run the Indian Grocery store moved to the US in 1975 and 3 decades of life here has left them regretting about almost everything - loss of identity, cultural alienation of their children, emotional stress of not having anyone to fall back on in times of need... And every sentence that they spoke ends in the ray of hope that they would be able to go back to their home town in Kerala soon once and for all. On the other hand, I doubt if they would ever be able to throw away their possessions and memories here and leave US forever. Classic example of being neither here nor there.Kururhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00924894164227591647noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-16891685108651991912006-12-29T22:23:00.000+05:302006-12-29T22:23:00.000+05:30What is that makes the average Andhraite so obsess...<b>What is that makes the average Andhraite so obsessed with the idea of going abroad or more precisely the US of A?</b><br /><br />It is the same thing that used to drive so many people to work in the middle east or the south east. It is the same thing that must have driven many people in the ancient times to move from the villages to the cities with royal palaces, business and entertainment. The only difference being that people had to travel fewer miles to reach their destinations while it takes the same effort to reach these longer distances now.<br /><br /><b>South India generally suffers from a certain genetic disorder which<br />forces them to become either engineers or doctors and I guess the problem is more accentuated in Andhra Pradesh.</b><br /><br />I believe that this isn't a genetic disorder but lack of right career counseling. Unlike lots of other developed countries, India does not provide any income to its unemployed families and every person would want his future to be financially secure. An MLA's/MP's kin would think of getting into politics, an actor's/actresses' kin would think of being an actor/actress. The environment in which they grow makes them feel confident about being able to work in that kind of a profession.<br /><br />Few people choose the tough/right way to earn better while most of us would want to come it the easy way. Few people achieve big in other fields. Everyone do not happen to recognize their talent for the right field.<br /><br />Looking at it at a different perspective, since most of our friends are either Engineers or doctors or have settled abroad does not mean that a major population is in the same drive. Had you been in jewellery business, you would have found lot of people being in the jewellery business. A period when you feel you have a high competition in the jewellery market you may start feeling, every guy wants to be in the jewellery business.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-83142226202860050242006-12-29T20:54:00.000+05:302006-12-29T20:54:00.000+05:30Good one Pradeep,
My favourite is the Engineer or...Good one Pradeep,<br /><br />My favourite is the Engineer or Doctors syndrome. I also liked <br />the "Kerala" example which kind of strengthened why you chose to <br />emphasize on A.P. You have a very strong hold on your writing.<br /><br />I wish you did not generalize some points. You have to be unbiased <br />if you wish to publish such articles.<br /><br />Good job.<br />SreeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-11510964361994186972006-12-29T15:25:00.000+05:302006-12-29T15:25:00.000+05:30Bingo....you sure hit the dot.
The inherited Andhr...Bingo....you sure hit the dot.<br />The inherited Andhraite Flight is driven by a sense of rupee disparity and a need to showcase.<br /> <br />Your value increases if you are "US returned" and is tremendous if "US settled". Back there the aim is to save as much as possible and hence familial ties take a backseat.<br /> <br />But, as usual, the tone was slightly bitter, I see you have tried hard not to sound sarcastic.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30383704.post-65602034015565882132006-12-27T10:46:00.000+05:302006-12-27T10:46:00.000+05:30Well true the dollar dreams are quite strong.... a...Well true the dollar dreams are quite strong.... and why only south it is true Pan India.... Gujjus, Panjus may only differ with the fact that theirs is either Pound or Canadian dollar dream.....<br /><br />But something much more scaring is the repercussion of the entire trend of children migrating to greener pastures leaving behind their elderly parents behind with empty nest syndrome….well the dollar earnings & good lifestyle promise does overwhelm in the initial days but alas it does not last long…..the trail of sadness & emptiness is all that is left behind. Parents longing to meet their child…waiting to hear them over phone … to see them once a while thru video conferencing (certain well to do city bred can think of that)…and the seldom fulfilling dream of meeting in person… the dollar is then no longer the ultimate attraction but the few moments of holding your offsprings hand…hearing a loved one complain…have a banter…. Crib on life… cook for him/her…. Minute pleasures of life suddenly seem to be the major ones then. Things people never cared for, moments never even realized leave alone cherished before are the ones to die for now.<br /><br />Innumerable parents who have encouraged dollar dreams in their child…tutored them to achieving them & later realized the emotional vaccum left in the aftermath of the successful dollar flight. Now all that is left is their vacant palatial ‘house’ build from the dollar remittances, much larger & emptier than their earlier small ‘homes’. Silver framed photo of their son/daughter with their luxury cars sent from abroad rather than the person they called their own. The parents are never going to travel in that luxury car with their kids… live in that luxury home…& the kids will never be able to come back to reverse the cycle, for the lure of money/luxury will be too overpowering by then for their minds which has been conditioned from childhood to think only about more & more money…(well who is to be blamed).<br /><br />Children don’t wish to come back once abroad for one they think ‘India’ stinks and no longer worth their presence…when the actual fact may be the lack of leave from their offices…cost of commuting … to their own children who do not know anything of their parents hometown & are more familiar with a Newyork or London….and hence not interested to travel down…<br /><br />All that remains with the people who nurture the dollar dreams is a ‘photograph’ of their sons & daughters… the garish huge empty ‘House’ built with the remitted dollars…and a wish for their remaining life to see their own…well isn’t that what they started out for?<br /><br />Happy dreaming!! remember there is a nightmare that awaits tooUnknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06119819718490840709noreply@blogger.com